Insanity can be a good thing
by WhiteFoxLia
Summary: 'Idiots. All of them are mindless fucking idiots. Looking at me as if I'm the crazy one, as if I'm losing my mind.'
1. Chapter 1

Idiots. All of them are mindless fucking idiots. Looking at me as if I'm the crazy one, as if I'm losing my mind. I laugh while shaking my head, my brown hair cascades over my forehead. I check the tightness of my cuffs that are binding my hands together behind my back. The once cold metal is now warm and is starting to dig into my skin with every tug and pull. They're still as tight as ever. "Guilty." I scoff. That was obvious. They all knew I was the one who done it. "Her sentence is as follows. Her life will be spent in the Washington state penitentiary with no chance of parole." A loud bang echoes and I'm hauled to my feet. Both of the gentlemen either side of me are strong and tough. They could probably hold their own against me if they tried really hard. I mean really tried, I may look small and weak just because I'm thin but I get so uncontrollable that it can be scary.

I look up at the judge. The man looks ridiculous in his wig that he's trying to pass off as natural hair. I smirk at him. He shudders slightly and leans back in his thick leathery chair. A thought of running a sharp blade through his neck comes to mind and I snake my tongue out and lick my top lip slowly. They're dry, and the saliva on my tongue wets it making it shine slightly.

His eyes express to me his fear and I bet he thinks himself lucky because of the small army of security in the room, all here to protect him and the bystanders. Fucking stuck up coward.

"This way." Someone orders me while tugging on my arm. I'm pulled along out of the courtroom. Every single person is wary of us as I'm dragged around, and it probably doesn't help that I glare at them. The clink of my hand cuffs catching my attention every time they touch.

The repetitive sound slowly engraving itself in the back of my mind with every few steps that I'm forced to take.

We stop outside a room a few minutes later. There's a large metal door with several locks down the side of it and across the top. I peer into the room through the gap just before it swings open. The hands on my arms tighten slightly and another person appears out of nowhere and unlocks my handcuffs. I smile slightly and relish in the freedom. That is until the two men tighten their fucking grip on my arms. "Consider this home until further notice." His gruff voice barks into my ear. I snarl at him and go in the cell with a 'bit' of help.

The door swings shut behind me with a hollow bang that vibrates through my chest. I glare at the cocky ass hole through the small gap, he's smirking at me. I growl and slam my hands on the door either side of where is head is. The impact making a loud bang and I bring my face as close as I can to his.

"Consider yourself fucking lucky there's a door here asshole." I hiss menacingly at him. Saliva comes from his mouth through his cracked lips. I gag in disgust. He smiles and I spit in his face. He doesn't like that and scowls at me. I glare right back at him; I'm definitely not going to cower. He's just a fucking pussy hiding behind a door.

"Don't worry darling. I do." He chuckles one last time then walks down the corridor whistling a fucking annoying tune. I slam my hands and head against the door and scream out my frustrations. The guys outside jump and I pound my hands against it again.

"Shut up you lunatic." I chuckle harshly and lean my head against it, my breaths coming in hard pants making my chest heave. I grab my hair between my fingers and start pulling them and fraying the ends. I tie the strands around my fingers and glare at the empty space of the room in front of me. This place is dull and lifeless; it's actually giving me a headache.

I screw my eyes shut tightly and ball my fists into a block and hit them against the floor repeatedly, counting every smack of the bruised flesh hitting the slabs. I swear I can hear them murmuring something, probably something nasty and uncalled for, but I continue doing it. Not for the purpose of annoying him, but for the sake of my sanity.

You may think I'm crazy, but with every pound I find myself getting calmer. Though it's only a little bit, the hitting eases my pent up frustrations. I slowly open my eyes after no idea how long and stare at the bed, it has the worlds thinnest mattress on it and only a sheet.

I stagger to my feet and ignore the dull stinging in my knuckles.

I collapse on the bed. It's about as comfortable as it looks. I wrap the thin sheet around me and close my eyes. And for a moment I forget where I am. The cell goes beyond me and I picture myself at home, in my bed and talking to Angela. She's girl I've known since high school. My best friend. We'd talk about everything, even stupid little things like who we liked, or the teachers, sometimes our schedules for the year. That was always fun. She's a heck of a lot smarter than me so she had a few classes that I wasn't in, that annoyed us both.

I then think of my mum and dad, but not of them arguing. But of them lying on the kitchen floor smothered in blood. Mine and their own. I nearly laugh as I think of their dead bodies, I know it seems crazy but they were not the nicest of people. They used to do things to me, such unimaginable things to do to your own daughter. I hate them for it. So I had to do it, I had to kill them.

Angela was just collateral damage.

But for a strange reason I don't feel any guilt, just an emptiness. I bleak and seemingly endless space of emptiness inside of me. I shout out something and kick my legs out. Lashing out always helps for some reason, and sometimes it feels good.

So fucking good.

I look to the door and see a guard peeking in at me. I smile. It's wide and very creepy looking on my face. His features drops and he goes back to his standing position. Ram rod straight back and hiding to the side of the door so I can't see him. I revert back to my relaxed face and lie down and close my eyes again. I really need to sleep. I've had such a long few days. That case dragged on for hours on end, and I'm glad it's over, I was about to lose my mind if I was in there any longer.

_I let out a slow breathe and begin to drift into a fitful sleep._

_"You know what I'm going to do. I'm gonna ask him myself, if he's going to be shy about it then I'm going to take charge." I lean back on the bench and look at her. She's so excited about prom. Well I can't say that I blame her, I am too. If they let me go that is. I've been asked by a few people already, both guys and girls and I'm really thankful for that. Gives me plenty of options, and gives me a chance to go with someone that I really want to. But that person has yet to ask._

_"Well I hope he says yes. You deserve it." I smile at her and loop and arm around her pulling her down into my lap. She chuckles._

_"Me too." Her own arm goes over my shoulder and we look out at the near empty field. This is our place. It lets us talk in peace and we know that no one will ever hear us. "I'll ask him at school tomorrow." She hops off me and dances around in a little circle. Her arms waving about happily and a pretty smile on her face. "Who are you going to go with?" I shrug. "With those delicious choices you have it's a hard pick." I laugh._

_"Hmm maybe you're right, but I really want to go with Lauren." She smiles broadly and continues her little dance._

_"Can I be there when you ask her?"_

_"Can I be there when you ask Ben?" She raises an eyebrow._

_"Do you enjoy answering my questions with other questions?" She asks me._

_"Do you?" I fire back with a smirk. She chuckles and sits down on the grass, her legs bent and hands over her stomach. She nods. "I do hon. Now come down here. I'm lonely." I groan and join her, landing on my hands and knees. She chuckles at me and I flick her on the forehead._

"Swan." I crack open my eyes just in time to see two guards stride in. Another man is following them a few steps behind. He waves at me and watches in interest as I'm slapped back into the handcuffs and hoisted out of the bed. A belt is wrapped around my biceps and is strapped tight, and I can't move my arms a lot.

"Stupid fuckers." I hiss. They laugh at me. I thrash about and kick my legs around. They really are stupid fuckers. I catch the guard on the left in the stomach and he grunts. The man watching starts to back away, sweat glistening on his forehead. I smile and flick my hair back with a jarred movement of my head.

"Who the hell are you?"

"Brian." He stutters. God he's annoying. What is he even doing in here? He's like eighteen or something. I glare at the boy as I get dragged passed him and out of the room. Wait a minute, where are they taking me? I dig my feet into the ground and wince when a sharp pain shoots through my feet. The men chuckle and haul me off my feet.

"Come on." I'm lifted off the ground by my arms and I kick my leg back, catching Brian in the nose as he follows behind. I chuckle and lay my head back to watch him as he collides with the ground. His eyes are glistening and I laugh at him. I stare down at me feet; they're covered in blood and are pretty badly bruised. Once of my nails are cracked down the side and I have an urge to rip it off. The men either side of me motion for some guy to open a door and he does hastily. I hiss at him as we pass but he doesn't even react.

Wait? Were the fuck am I?

I look around, it's a large room, full of pristine white tables with several black plastic chairs surrounding each one.

Is it me or does this building seem to have an endless supply of bullshit in it? First I'm in a courtroom, then a fucking cell, now what looks to be a room full of crazies. Minus the actual crazies, just a room where they'd be put in. My hands behind my back are straightened out and I groan when something else is locked onto them, securing them above my elbow so their straight along my spine and are nearly unable to move.

There are two entrances to the room that I can see. One is where we came in from and the other one is to the right of us, about five metres away.

"Buck, why the fuck am I here?" I chuckle at the name I've given him and glare at the guy behind me. He scowls. I glance at the other one with a raised eyebrow, he isn't even looking at me.

Snobbish bastard.

"Just shut up and sit down." Buck orders. I'm pushed into a chair, the nail catches the metal leg and pulling half of it off. I glare at my foot and wonder why there not in handcuffs. Surely they must think I can kill someone with my feet. As strange as that sounds I'm actually surprised that they haven't done anything about it.

Blood drips onto the shiny floor and it starts to form a small puddle.

The puddle slowly grows bigger as I wait for someone to meet us here. I'm assuming someone is supposed to otherwise I'd still be in a fucking cell.

The door opens.

It's about fucking time.

I look up. I was not expecting this. I plant my feet on the table and the man walking over to us doesn't take his eyes of mine. They're a soft green. There's a small army behind him and he doesn't hesitate to take a seat opposite me at the table. I keep my feet there, it's not like it's annoying him.

"Hello Miss Swan." I keep my lips sewn shut. "I was having a talk with someone who I'm sure you distaste." The judge, he's right. I hate him, and his puffy wig. I chuckle. Stupid idiot. "And he seems to want you out of this courthouse, or out of this state as he put it." I laugh at him and he doesn't do a thing apart from wait for me to finish.

"And you're going to do just that are you?" He folds his arms on the table and leans forward slightly. A file is put on the table in between us and he flicks it open. It's mine. I put my feet on the floor and move forward so I can see it better. Damn my pictures horrible. I have blood stains on my cheek and neck, and my hair is such a mess. I stare at it and there's everything on there, my parents, my date of birth, my crimes, even a photo of when I was younger. "Why are showing me this?"

He coughs and his eyes harden slightly. "My name is Carlisle Cullen, Bella. And I am here to do just as he 'requested'." I smirk. This should be interesting. "I hate to make this so formal." He sighs. "But I have a place for you. It's at my clinic. I treat people with many different issues, and problems. And you might not notice it yet, but I think there is something else going on inside you, something that I can help you with." Is he trying to sell something to me? The clinic maybe? Or himself? "I am willing to have you come along with me, there you'll meet people, get help for yourself and you won't be spending the rest of your life in a cell only to be let out a few hours a day. If that. And I promise the food is much nicer than what you might have to get used to."

He can't be serious. I've murdered people, how can it get any simpler than that. I just snapped and killed my parents, there is nothing else going on inside of me, and I most definitely don't want to go with him to his 'clinic'. I don't have problems or issues, and even if I did I don't want him to fix them.

I'm fine just the way I am.

He can fuck off.

I glare at Carlisle. I really want to know what he's thinking. His face is so closed off, even his eyes are showing next to nothing. He pinches the bridge of his nose and closes his eyes briefly. "And why the fuck would I want your help?" I ask not to nicely. He looks at me. The men at his side take a step towards the table, or to me as if I'm going to chew his head off.

That would be disgusting.

Knives are much cleaner, and I'd get bits stuck in between my teeth.

He lets out a long breathe and I nearly tell him to hurry the bloody hell up, but he speaks very soon after I think that as if he read my mind. "Because it's the only time anyone is ever going to offer you it again. This is your last chance." I test out my freedom of my arms. They don't budge. Fuck. I groan and slam my forehead on the table.

He's right. I can either go with him, or rot in a room for the rest of my life. At this moment the cell is starting to sound wonderful. No people and all the alone time I want. But alone time means me and my fucking thoughts. And only them.

I lean back awkwardly in the chair as much as I can without putting too much pressure on my arms, and stare at Carlisle. He seems pretty genuine in his offer, but I have no idea where this clinic is, what's going to happen there, or how long I'll be there for.

I groan and look back at the table. "This is the only time you'll offer, correct?" I say through gritted teeth. He nods and reclines back in his chair and crosses his legs. "Then I guess I have no choice but to go with you." The corners of his lips quirk up and I clench my hands into fist.

"Excellent. Everything has already been arranged and the transport is already sorted. Men let her go and Bella come with me." I stand up and kick the chair back in the process. It clatters on the floor and everyone is alert at the bang.

"Uh...Carlisle, should I go?" I chuckle. I completely forgot about Brian. He now has a bandage on his chin and a black eye. I smirk and walk around the table to stand next to Carlisle. He's taller than me, my head just about clears his shoulder. I blink a couple times and wonder why this man is not scared of me, nearly every other person I've met or even seen has been a bit frightened. Just what is he going to do to me at the clinic?

"With us?" Brian nods. Carlisle smiles at him. "Sure." Great. "Come on, we don't have much longer." He turns around and walks out the room. I look at Buck and grumpy and smirk. Buck chuckles harshly and Grumpy just stares at me as I slowly walk backwards. "Bella come on, hurry up." I groan and turn around in a huff.

Carlisle chuckles and I glare at the back of his head, hoping to somehow blow it up. Not likely to happen but it's a nice though to have as I walk. It keeps my mind occupied.

"We can I getting these off?" I ask once we're outside. His small army made sure that I didn't hurt him on my out of the building. All of them were close to me and surrounding me all of the time. Not letting me slow down or speed up.

The man in question turns back as he opens a car door. "When you get to your room." I groan. The back of the car is opened. And I step inside. The back is caged off from the front by several layers of glass and wire. I smirk. Maybe they really are scared after all.

I take a seat. Four of his 'friends' join me. I have one sit next to me and the other three across from me.

"So Carlisle, Am I going to get my own room?" He chuckles and we take off.

I frown. I wasn't kidding, I really want my own room.

**An another story for you. I know it might seem a bit crazy to upload so many at a time but these ideas keep hitting me and I would really love to know what you think of them. In this story Bella's going to be a bit different and so is Alice, but I hope you like it all the same.**

**Feedback is welcome, and if you want to PM me about anything, go right ahead.**

**Thanks for reading, see you next time :)**

**Lia**


	2. Chapter 2

By the time we pull up at his clinic it's late in the evening and I'm close to tearing my hair out. It feels like we've been driving for days and I've had a fucking nuff of looking at the cocky bastard in front of me. He keeps dazing out and I can pick up on the glazed look in his eyes. He has short cut blonde hair and misty green eyes, that I swear has caused me to hate the colour green for the rest of my life.

I hiss at him and his eyes lock onto me. What a creep. I spit at him again and it lands on his cheek. He wipes it off with disgust. I smirk and hold back a chuckle.

Carlisle climbs out of the vehicle and a few seconds later the back of it is opened. The smell of fresh air hits me and I breathe it in, in large gulps as I get out of the back and land on the concrete. "I hope it wasn't too bad for you." He says to me. I nod at Carlisle and look up at his clinic. It looks more like a hospital. I look back at Carlisle and he's still staring at me. "Is there a problem?" I shrug and lean back onto the now closed door. I move my head left and right to take it in, there's a wide open lawn surrounding the entire complex. One entrance into the place, and I nearly laugh at the locked windows, and the much more heavily barred windows on the lower floors.

"No. None whatsoever." I hiss and tug on my arms roughly gaining his immediate attention. He frowns and does a small gesture with his hand. The little guy called Brian unlocks the things binding my arms and I immediately bring them in front of me and rub them. They're red and sore. I nod my thanks at the short guy and then look back at the Cullen.

"Okay, why don't we go inside? I'll introduce you to my wife; she's also the head nurse here. She'll help you during your stay, so feel free to ask her anything."He takes off and walks up to the main door, he holds it open for me and I follow in.

The halls are wide open and quite spacey. It's kept in near pristine condition. To the right there's a room, a man is there and he's surrounded by monitors. All of them split into four different sections showing different areas.

"That's James. He's the head of security." I nod and stare the blonde guy until he's no longer in my sight. I shrug and run a hand through my hair. It's still in need of a good brush, and I could probably have a shower. We take a left and I look down the opposite direction. There's a woman standing there, she has bright blonde hair, gorgeous icy eyes and a killer smirk. Her outfit though is strange. It's grey and white. The clothes are loose and hang off her body, leaving everything to the imagination. A cough snaps me out of it and I see Carlisle a few feet ahead of me. There's a woman with him.

She's quite beautiful and is obviously Carlisle's wife if his hand around her waist has anything to do with it. She smiles at me and holds out a bag. I glance at it but take it from her hand.

"Hello. I'm Esme Cullen, the head nurse and if you won't mind I would like to have a word with you later. I would also like to say welcome, I'm sure it's going to be very beneficial for you while you here. Despite the circumstances I hope your stay here isn't too bad." Oh God no. "Don't be so worri-" I cut her off immediately.

Now angry.

"I'm not worried." I hiss and clench my hands tighter around the strap of the bag. My arms sting a bit from the force I'm using and I bare my teeth like an animal at her. My biceps are grabbed tightly and I drop the bag to the floor. The large fingers hold on tight and the pressure on my skin and bones hurts. "Get the fuck off me." I scream. I'm forced to the ground screaming. I kick and try and claw but my hands are locked and my legs are bound tightly. Carlisle looks down at me, he looks disappointed and he orders the guys to take to my room to get used to it. Yeah right, it's going to be hell.

"I'll see you later dear." Esme says as I'm being taken away. Two faced fuck. She turns to look at Carlisle and whispers something to him.

I'm hauled off my feet and the sound of a small snort catches my attention. The blonde woman smirks at me as I pass, mirth swimming in her eyes. I hiss at her and slam my head back into a rock hard body. The guy grunts but otherwise doesn't say a word.

"Be careful. You don't want to be secured in lockdown on your first day. Try and make a good impression with the others, even though I'm sure they'll love to see this." She says calmly.

"Fuck you!" She's unfazed, and chuckles and then I get hauled around a corner. I put up a fight the rest of the way and only when I get to my room do I feel calm enough to relax a little bit. They're not nasty to me when I get there, they simply put it me on my bed with my hands and feet still bound. My expectations are overcome when they loosen them up a bit before leaving. I presume they're waiting outside since I can still here the laboured breathing. Man I must've hit him harder than I thought.

I take a deep breath before I scream and slam my face down into the pillow. It's soft and I realize that this is probably one of the comfiest beds I've ever been on. I turn my head to the left and see a plain room. But it's nicer than my old room, and it has all the stuff I need. Still, it looks rather boring, everything is in a dark brown and there is only a small carpet covering the floor. I grunt into my pillow.

A year ago I would never have pictured my life like this.

I'd always thought that I'd get out of my house after school and disappear with Angela off to college. We'd get boyfriends and get into the classes that we wanted. I'd get a small job, just enough to keep me afloat and pay off any loans. Angela, being the genius that she is would be majoring in something complicated I would have no hope of ever understating.

A lone tear rolls down my face.

I fucked up.

I fucked up so big. And there's no way for me to fix it.

I turn my head so it's smothered by the pillow. The awkward angle of my arms is only reinforcing the amount of pressure that is pushing my face down into it.

I take the deepest gulp of air that I can manage and close my eyes. Stopping any more tears from escaping.

My father always told me that crying is a weakness. Always has thought it. It shows other people the pain you feel inside. And that pain is supposed to be kept locked up inside. To never be shown to others; because the pain that you feel, could be used as a pike to stab you with. It always happens that if you show someone your weakness. It is bound to come back and bite you in the ass.

"Hey." I roll over and stare out into my room. It's dark and the lamp on the desk has been switched on. There's a woman leaning back on the desk and I glower when I realise the woman is Esme. She looks troubled but I don't have it in me to give a fuck.

"I'm sorry about earlier. If I said something to upset you I take it back." I chuckle. Her half hearted apology is meaningless.

"Just fuck off. I don't want my first night here spent in your presence." She frowns at that. Her features contort into something that takes away her beauty, replacing it with something that doesn't fit her. I would have snorted if I wasn't trying to sleep. "Leave me alone." I hear her sigh as I face to my wall.

"I'll be back at seven. You'll eat breakfast in here, then me and Carlisle would like a word with you." This time I manage to snort.

"Good luck with that." She's gonna need it if she thinks I'm going to comply with any of that. For all I know she'd poison it. That wouldn't surprise me after how I've behaved towards her. If she has the guts to do it, I think she would. And she doesn't look like the sort of person to put up with bullshit for very long.

"Good night Bella. Sleep well." I grunt. She leaves without a word. I smile when I'm finally alone. The lamp on the table switches off and I can't help but chuckle. It's nice to have time to myself, as everyone probably thinks; but the trouble is, my mind is a screwed up mess at the moment. It's going to give me no peace of mind.

A pain shoots through my arm and I' m reminded of my current position. They did say I could have these off right? I tug on them a few times, digging the material into my arms. I wince. Guess she might need to come back for a little while."Esme?" I call out. Nothing.

"Esme." I yell. Louder this time.

The door opens a few minutes later after my constant yelling of her name. She looks a bit ruffled and panicked. "What's wrong?" She asks.

"You can't expect me to sleep like this can you?" Her panicked expression calms and she shakes her head and runs her hand over her belt to her key chains.

"Promise me I can trust you if I do this." I smirk and turn over so she has access to the wretched things. I don't answer. She doesn't move an inch. Her fingers absentmindedly play with the keys. Small clinks reach my ears, teasing me. "Promise me, or you can spend your first night here exactly as you are." Cocky little thing. I smirk at her bravery and nod subtly before answering.

"I promise I won't try to kill you." My voice is muffled by the pillow. I tilt it to the side a little bit. "Good enough?"

She chuckles and her hands smoothen out my shirt before starting her journey up my arms to unlock everything that's binding me. "I suppose it'll have to do for now. Get some sleep. You have quite a day planned for tomorrow and I'll be damned if we don't get everything done."

When they're free I bring them to the front of me and look them over. Man, they're really red. I nod at Esme who smiles, and happy that I'm keeping my promise. It's not like I'm some raving lunatic who kills everyone that moves. She doesn't seem nervous, but she does seem a bit on edge. She doesn't trust me, and I don't blame her really.

I rub my arms up to my elbow then back down again. I keep doing this until the pain eases a bit, all the while Esme sits watching me.

"Remember, seven o'clock for breakfast then we'll need to get you ready." I snort and collapse back on the bed. My eyes close and my lips form into a small smile.

"Whatever." She chuckles.

"Good night Bella."

I sigh and wrap the blanket around myself.

I run a brush through my hair as I stare at the mirror. It's a complete tangled mess of knots. The soft brown curls are now bunched together and intertwined to make the mess that is called my birds nest. As of now, I am sitting on my bed at four in the morning. I woke up and had nothing better to do, and my hair is a mess. So I looked for a hair brush and found one in a drawer and started brushing.

I pull it through the mess and yelp when it hurts more than helps. I groan and slam the hair brush down on the desk. The loud bang doesn't bother me but it irritates someone else because the guy outside my room tells me to be quiet. But that is just a semi-reasonable way to say shut the fuck up. I chuckle at him and glare at the brush. Bristles pointed up, my hair sticking to them.

"Get back into bed." The man says again, but I get the feeling it's not towards me. I get up and go towards the door. "Did you hear me miss Brandon, I said go back to bed." Miss Brandon? Oh well, I'll find out soon enough. I don't think she's leaving. I hear a laugh and her soft footsteps become detectable if I listen closely.

"Is that her?" She's curious. Her voice has a lift at the end, piquing my curiosity.

"Go back to bed." He's getting irritated.

"Hey, are you the new girl Rosalie told me about?" I chuckle and knock on the door to let her know I'm listening. She laughs. "Not going to speak to me are you?"

"Go back to your bed." I slam my hands onto the door and the guy yells it again, at both of us this time. I smirk and nearly laugh when I hear her chuckle softly.

I shake my head. Miss Brandon.

"See you tomorrow." She gets out before she walks off, presumably to go back to her room.

After such a strange night Esme still insisted on waking me up at seven. I almost bit her head of when she pulled the blanket off me.

I glare up at her, then at the sun coming in through the window. I nearly laugh at the bars but I yawn instead and reach out my hand while my eyes are shut, hoping to grab hold of the blanket. I reach air and grind my teeth, reminding myself not to lash out.

"Give it back." She drops it to the floor and points to a tray. I smell the food, it causes my stomach to rumble.

"Eat." She says. "Before it gets cold. You'll like it." I glare up at her. She's smiling. I raise an eyebrow and sit up, my shirt falls back over my stomach and I brush passed her to the tray. There's an assortment of food, things like pancakes, bacon, toast, juice and fruit. I snatch up the apple and the glass of juice and lean back. I stare at Esme as she moves around my room, tidying up and raise an eyebrow when she goes into my wardrobe.

"What do you think you're doing?" I growl and drop the apple to the floor.

I never have liked someone going through my things. She closes the door, shirt and trousers in hand. "Put these on, I'll wait outside." I glare. She still doesn't acknowledge it and just huffs and drops the clothes to the bed.

"I'll give you a few more minutes to get ready then I'll be back in."

Yeah because like fuck that's going to happen.

When she's gone I collapse back on the bed and wrap the blanket around me. The apple in my hand is not hard, but not exactly soft. I bring it to my mouth and take a chunk of it as I lie in silence. About half of it is left when she comes back in. She rips it from me; I drop the apple to the floor and hiss at her. Bitch. The orderly behind her takes a step forward and keeps his hand poised on his belt. I dart my eyes back to his, then Esme's. She has an eyebrow raised. Waiting for me like I'm a snobby brat.

I groan and take off my shirt and trousers, keeping my eyes locked on hers. I drop them to the floor and rest my hand on my naked him. I look up at the guy and glare. His eyes are on my face. I grab the clothes she laid out and put them on in a huff. When I'm done I finish my juice and walk with her out of the room.

"That wasn't too bad now was it Isabella?" I shrug. She really should learn to not talk to me. I don't want to speak to her, her voice is annoying and the looks she gives me are even worse.

"First we have to talk to Carlisle, he's in his office and he'll be explaining the running of things around here. Then after we have to get you acquainted with the area and I'm hoping to introduce you to someone. You might like her, and she can show the ropes when me or Carlisle can't." Okay then. This should be boring. Why did I agree to come here again? Oh yeah, it's either this or being in a room twenty four hours a day. The only company, my mind.

I'm starting to regret agreeing. This place is going to drive me crazy.

"Down there is the quad." She points to an open area through glass doors. There's a small black box on the wall, not very big with a blue, red and green light flashing on it. There's a red line underneath and I frown when it beeps just as someone runs a card under it. "You can hang out there as long as you have no other prior commitments."

I nod slightly and hold the sleeves of my shirt down and bunch them up in my hands as we start walking again.

"It's just through here." She holds open a door for me and I go into his office. Holy mother of God. It looks like a library, with the high ceilings, rows upon rows of books, a second floor to get the higher ones, and a few adders leaning against shelves on wheels. His desk is right in front of us, he's there. Glasses on his head and has a folder resting in front of him. The smell of coffee is in the air and I can the near empty cup on his table.

He looks up and smiles at me and Esme, "Good morning. Trust you slept well." I snort. As well as I could in that room. Or is he forgetting that my arms and legs were bound only a few moments before I fell asleep? He beckons me forward to sit in the chair in front of his desk. "Now Isabella, how did you sleep?"

I shrug and put my feet on his desk. He frowns at that but leans back in his chair and stares at me. "Could have been better." I answer as I tilt my head up to look at Brian, he's searching through the books, a pile at his feet.

"Well hopefully you'll get used to it as time goes by. Now. I assume Esme told you what I wanted to talk about so I'll just get right down to it, shall I." I change positions of my leg and switch them over so that the one what was underneath is now on top. "First off, this is not some sort of prison, you are mainly allowed to do as you please, as long as it does not harm yourself or others" I snort. That is not going to be easy. "Is that a problem?" He asks.

"Depends on whether or not someone starts something."

"I highly doubt that. And another thing, we have this thing called lock down. It's where you and you alone is put in a place of my choosing. It lets you get your anger out, in a confined space and controlled area. Most of them see it as a punishment though, because the thing they hate most is being left alone. They have nothing else to do apart from think, and that tends to make them relent a bit quicker." Well that's fucked up. "You will be woken at seven every morning, and you can eat breakfast either in your room, or the dining hall. That is up to you. Lights out is between nine and ten, no later." I chuckle. He has got to be kidding me; there is no way I'm going to seep that early.

"If you are caught outside of your room after lights out you will be taken back. By force if necessary." Hah, of course. Is that why Brandon was out last night? No one dragged her back.

"During the week you'll have therapy with me; and a group session with everyone else. In those I must ask you to be honest about how you feel, but to not be harsh. You wouldn't like if someone is nasty to you, so why should you act that way to them?" I sigh. I'm gonna be stuck in here for hours. I can tell.

I close my eyes and try to pay attention, but it's difficult, and be awoken so early isn't helping either.

"Morning Carlisle." Someone announces as they stride in. I turn my head. It's the blonde form yesterday.

"Ah Rosalie dear, this is Isabella Swan." She smirks at me and leans against Carlisle desk. She says her good morning to Esme then looks back over to Carlisle. "I'm sorry to ask this of you, but would you mind showing her around. I'm sure she'd prefer it, than one of us?" I chuckle and drop my feet to the floor. This could have gone worse I guess. He could have asked Esme to walk me around. And I'm not gonna lie, I might have smacked her a few times.

"It'd be my pleasure." She smiles at me and I smirk. She can't be serious. "Well don't just stare, get your ass up and I'll show you around this pit."

"Thank you Rosalie." She laughs and waits at the door for me to get up. I glance back at Carlisle. His face is blank as he watches me walk over to her. "Don't be too long, Esme wants to introduce her to Victoria before lunch." Rosalie nods and shuts the door behind us.

I let out a sigh and lean against it, her eyes are on me and I can't help but feel like she thinks she's better than me. "I never thought I was getting out of there. Do they have to talk so slowly, Jesus Christ." She chuckles.

"You'll do just fine."

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	3. Chapter 3

"And finally here we are." Rosalie announces boredly upon entering some sort of large and overly compensated living room. She walks over to a comfy looking brown sofa and drops back onto it. I snort and look around the room, run a hand through my hair and lean back on the wall just as the door slides shut behind us. It has been a couple hours after I had spoken to Carlisle, and Rosalie has been showing me around.

I can't say that it's been bad, but I also can't say that it's been good either. I'm near to stabbing my eyes out with how boring this place is. There's abso-fucking-lutely nothing to do. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. My hands clench at my side and I grit my teeth together, grinding them. "We call this the hide out." I hear rustling and her footsteps get closer. "Are you okay?" I nod and take another deep breathe.

"Well I don't believe you." Her hand touches mine and I snap open my eyes and smack it away.

Who gives a fuck what this girl thinks? She probably killed someone, or went crazy, or fucking both for all I care. I glare at her but her eyes don't falter from mine, they get stronger. Stubborn bitch. "Don't touch me." I hiss. She sighs and takes a couple steps back to give me some room. But I find it odd that she's doing this, yesterday I could've sworn she didn't like me. I shrug inwardly and slam my head back against the wall. Really hard. Yes it hurts, but I don't give a fuck. I do it again and slide down to the floor. I touch the back of my head and feel the blood.

Blood!

I clench my fists.

Don't remember. Don't remember. Don't remember. Don't remember.

I scream and ball my fists into my eyes until I'm seeing stars. The darkness around me sparkles and I chuckle with the odd sensation it brings to my body.

Screams

"Bella?"

A sharp knife

"I don't know what happene-"

Splattered blood

"-creaming, its nothing I have don-"

Open wounds

"Help me get her-"

Bleeding out

"Hold her still!"

Sirens blaring

"-oo strong."

Lifeless corpse

My throats sore when I try and speak. Have I swallowed a rock cocktail? I try and open my eyes but it's like they're glues together. I start to lift my hands up to wipe them away but I'm met with resistance. I scream out, blood scratching my throat. "Bella?" Where the hell am I? What happened? Fuuuck!

My shoulders are shaken, I slam my eyes open and glare at whatever is above me. Esme? I thrash around and slam my head back. Why the fuck has this happened? My eyes are burning and the tears fall down my face. "Bella?" I cough and I can taste the blood this time. There's a tingling sensation in my arm and I turn my head to see something being injected into me.

A clear liquid seeps into my body through the small needle and an odd sensation comes over me. I trry to resist and continue to thrash around. Whatever is holding me donw better let me get the fuck up. I hate it. I hate this. I fucking hate Esme. Get me up, let me get up. Her calm face is looking down at me. She seems a tad sympathetic, but it's gone when my thrashing stops. Fucking bitch. How could she do this to me, I haven't done anything. I cough again and I feel like I'm going to throw up my intestines. She hands me a glass of water and I take small sips. Well I can't exactly refues to swallow. I'd choke.

"Your in the infirmary. You collapsed my dear. You have nothing to worry about." I tug weakly at the restraints, my strength seeming to dissipate. "None of that Bella, they're for your own safety. We'll let you go once you've calmed down." I hiss and go to head butt her with whatever strength I have but I barely manage to lift my head off the bed. "Time to get some sleep, you'll feel better when you wake up." I don't want to sleep,I want to get up. I want Jacob. He'll help, I need him to help me. To get me out of here. I'm pathetic I know, but he's always been there for me. He might aswell be my brother.

My eye lids start to go heavy and my vision blurry. Seriously what the fuck did she inject me with. I can't help but slowly drift off against my well. She better hope she's not the first person I see when I wake up.

I wake up suddenly, with the feeling of hand covering my throat and struggling for breathe. I go to boltup straight but I'm caught and forced back down, the restraints have been loosened. I try to scream but my throat still feels scratchy and sore. I look around the infirmary slowly, my head spinning from the sudden awakening. There small beds, about 12 I'd say, curtains handing loosely between which I assume is to give privacy. There's a boy here, he looks about 19, he asleep on his side. Curly brown hair, and tanned skin. Sweat is dripping of his body and he shudders now and again, pulling his arms closer to his body every time.

I look up at the ceiling, it's tiled and I start counting them to calm myself. I find it theraputic. Angela enters my mind, dear sweet Angela. She was my best friend. Very curious, and attentive. I wonder what she's doing now. Or if she even knows where I am. Do you think she's worried about me? Wait, who am I even talking to? Never mind. I'd rather not get into that jsut yet.

I hope she does miss me, I miss her. I want my best friend back. And Jacob too. I just want to be home. Well not back to my house, just a place with them where I feel safe.

The dull thudding of shoes gets my attention immediately. I'ts carlisle. "It's good to see you're awake Bella. You've been sleeping for nearly a day now. How are you feeling." He smiles and he slips the slipboard he's holding underneath his arm and clasps his hands together in front of him. Awaiting an answer.

"Like shit." I answer honestly, my voice raspy.

"Well I'm sure that can be fixed. How about we get you out of these things and go and you get some food? Maybe you can relax in your room for a while. Oh and Rosalie has been wanting to see you, maybe talk ot her later?"I raise an eyebrow. He talks ot much, and it gets annoying rather fast. Ans just like Esme, I get an odd feeling from him. Like he seems nice and genuine, but there's jsut something else to it than that. He can't be doing all this for me, jsut for my sake. Can he?

He reaches over and undoes the restraint in just under a minute. I do as I did last time, just as a precaution, and rub my wrists. He eyes that carefully and reaches out an arm. As if I need help getting up. I scoff and stand, my legs are a bit shaky but I keep strong. Just barely. He frowns and I see him tapping his fingers on the clipboard.

Curious.

"This way Bella. I'll take you to the lunch hall for breakfast." I follow after him, and try to keep up to his pace. I think he notices my struggle and slows down. I scoff again, but inwardly. I don't need his pity, or patience. I'm fine.

The hallways stretch on forever, and my legs are getting weaker. I hiss slightly. I fucking hate this. I can fucking walk. I walked yesterday. I can do it today. I lean on the wall for support, my motivation sort of speech barely helping.

"Bella I can help you, if you wish." Carlisle is waiting ahead of me in the hall, staning in the centre of the path. While I'm hanging back, leaning on a while and panting. It shouldn't be this hard, I wasn't even out for a day.

"I'm fine." I grit out. I don't need his help, I don't want his grimy hands touching me. I straighten up and walk passed him, there's a sign handing on the ceiling, with an arrow point left, and the word lunch hall printed on it. Guess I'm going this way. I glare at him as he walks next to me, catching up easily. I don't understand him. He puzzles me.

"After breakfast Esme will be in the reception to take you to your room." I roll my eyes. He's got to be fucking kidding me. "This is where I leave you, I'll see you later Bella. I hope you feel better soon." I scowl and enter the lunch hall. It's busy, a little too busy. By the tall windows are lunch tables, all in rows, and a line at the front of the hall where people are lined at. Some of them yelling, making noises. Ewww. I gruntsand sit at an empty table near the window. I hate people, and especially those people. I feel the relief when I sit. No longer putting strain on my legs.

"You're up?" Oh for fucks sake. More people. Can't I have a fucking break.

"Obiously." I lbite back, then lean my arms on the table and smack my head onto them.

"What crawled up your ass and died, grumpy?" Rosalie chuckles to herself and sits opposit me. I look up at her through my hair. She smiles at me and I nod back. I'm not really in the mood for company or happiness. "How are you feeling? You gave me a shock yesterday." I raise an eyebrow. I don't see how I scared her, she doesn't even know me.

"I'm fine."

"You don't seem fine. But I won't pry." Thanks God. "What do you want for breakfaast? I get the feeling you don't want to talk to anyone so I'll get it for you." Finally some piece and quite. I shrug. "Anything you're allergic to?" I shake my head. "Okay I'll just get you some toast or something." She fucks off then, leaving me on my own. Finally, no people.

"Good morning Bella." Good God, why me? What have I done to deserve this. I lift my head up and glare.

"Fuck o-" Oh shit. "Morning Alice." She smirks at me. Wait what the fuck just happened. I shrug and just let it happen. The girl join me, but sits next to me instead of acrosss. I don't know if I mind it or not. I don't care at the moment though. I just want this headache to go. I can still feel the weakness in my body from whatever the fuck the put into my body so I can't exactly go anywhere.

"I just talked to Rosalie. She seemed worry about you Bella. I can see why. You look awful."

"She does doesn't she." Great more insults. And people. Just what I fucking want. A tray is placed infront of me, it knocks my arms and I push it forward when I sit up. My head wobbles and I steady myself, aswell as the hands on my shoulders. "Take it easy. Eat up." I see the toast and head Rosalie's words. I devour it quickly, my stomach grumbling once I've finished. The water on the table is also gone rather quickly. It's quenches my thirst and soothes my throat.

I place my hands on theh table. "I'm going back to my room, the noise in here is irritating." I stand up and walk awa from the. Alice smiles at me and wave, and puts the plate on the windowsill. The light hits her and illuminates her eyes. It takes my breathe away for a moment. And I stumble a little. What the fuck is happening to me?I shake my head and stagger out of the lunch hall, holding onto the handle for support. I'm surprised I'm not being followed to be honest. I though they would.

I trail my hands along the corrior wall all the way back to my room, my legs still weak.I reach my room and open the door. It looks exactly the same as the last time I saw it, apart from the bed is made. I lay on it and cross my arms over my chest.

What was that with Alice back there? She made me feel funny. I never feel like that, what on earth did she do to me. I take in a deep breathe and feel my chest expand, before exhaling. I can't even think rationally about this. I decide to thihnk about it at all. I instead close my eyes.I know I've had enough rest and sleep, but I just don't feel like moving or doing anthing. I just want to lay here and do nothing.

There's always problems with that, like when I was at home. People always interupt me, or just walk in. I was never left alone. I shudder. My dad used to visit me in my room a lot. I never liked that. He always made me feel uncomfortable, and the kisses he'd leave on my forehead would back my stomach churn.

My body suddenly feel tighter and my stomach clenches. I cover my hand with my mouth and try not to think about it. I realised I didn't close my door and see Esme standing there. "Oh dear sweetie, what's wrong?" That's it. I can't hold it back any more. I throw up my breakfast, it goes everywhee, on my bed, the floor, even on me. I close my eyes and feel the tears in the corners of them. Esme quickly stands me up and gives me the water she was bringin in for me.

"I'll just sort this our dear, just takee a seat and I'll clean it up." I shrug and sip the water. My throat and stomach hurt. And the sickening feeling won't leave my body.

"_Shhh, stay quiet Bells." I whimper._

I slam my eyes shut and hold the glass tighter. I can still hear his heavy voice by my ear, and his hard touch on my sensitive body. My stomach clenches again, but I hold it back this time and lean on the desk. I take another sip of the cool water and open my eyes. Esme has the sheets bundles by the door, and she has a phone pressed again her ear. Calling for help I assume. Oh well. I don't feel like protesting. Even though I'd rather not have more people in my room.

She looks at me and takes in my clothes. I lean back and avoid her eyes. "I'll get you some clothes out Bella." She does as she says and gets me clothes. I don't bother to move and she works around me.

My clothes have a horrible stench to them, and it's vile, they're starting to stick to omy skin. I turn my head away trying to rid my nose of ghe vile stench, and look at the door. I can see Alice down the hall, she's leaving against a wall and talking to a guy. He's taller than her, with bronze hair. He's making her smile. Something uncomforting settles over me.

Clothes are placed on the desk next to me and eagerly get changed, Esme turns away while I do so. It takes me a alittle loner than anticipated, and I'm just tugging my t-shirt down when a couple of guys start heading down the hall to my room. Dressed in a white uniform, consisting of a tight white shirt, and white khaki trousers. They're both tan, with slicked back black hair.

"We're here Esme." She smiles at the two boys.

"Hello dears, would you be so kind as to take the laundry to the wash room, and Paul can you get me a mop and bucket from the storage room down the hall?" They do so eagerly. I never uderstand people like this, how they would be so willing to help. Must be the pay check.

"Sweetheart?" I glance at her, and the empty glass in her hand that she's holding out her hand for. I place it in her hand and lean back even more onto the desk and hop onto it. "I'll get you another one in a minute, once I've remade you're bed are you feeling okay enough to lay donw and get some rest? Not sleep, just lay here peacefully for a while. I can get Alice or Rosalie to come and join you if you like." A simple request I guess.

I shrug. I don't feel like talking to her. "I'll sleep. I don't want to talk to anyone." She nods. She looks sad that I said that, she must assume I'd want company.

"Oh, that's okay dear. I'll just go and see Carlisle, he'll want to know about this." She leaves the room, I think she'll bring me back some water, like she said. And that guy has yet to come back with the mop. I cross my legs and swing them back and forth slowly, my weak muscles straining from the continuous movement. I swing my legs back and forth for a good few minutes before anyone come back in. I think she said his name was Paul. He smiles at me. I only raise an eyebrow at him and keep swining my legs.

I almost feel bad for him having to clean it up. But it soon passes and I close my eyes.

"Miss?" I look at him sharply, annoyed that he had interupted my thoughts. "I've finished. Sam should be back soon with the bedding. He'll make it, no need to worry yourself with that." He scampers out the room, almost reinds me of a dog. If only he had a tail. I don't bother to thank him, instead watch him leave. I look around for Alice, but she's gone, I can't see her anywhere. Probably gone to talk with that boy some more. I snarl. He annoys me. Why does he need to talk to Alice anyway.

"I'm her to make the bed miss." Same enters my room when I nod at him. He's more nervous than Paul was, must be me. I chuckle. It's always me. Always has been and always will be. I ahve a tendancy to scare or worry people. Especially my friends, I've never liked that. Especially Angela. She always worried to much. I guess that's why I liked her to be honest. Because she looked out for me, and stuck up for me, not that I needed it that much. I could take care of myself for the most part.

I remember one time when she had her birthday party, we were both barely in our teens, she had the most amazing cake. Her mother made it for her. She always was an excellent cook. I used to go to hers for dinner often, and have sleepovers. We'd also invite Jess, I never liked that much. Jess has always been arrogant, which annoyed me, and the only thing she could talk about was herself. It got tiring being wit hfriends with her. In the end I just stopped talking to her. I couldn't deal with all her problems aswell as my own. That was damn impossible. I had a lot going on in my life aswell. With Edward, Jacob, even my parents and the god damn neighbours. Not to mention my school. The students were never the best behaved towards me.

They used to make fun, say mean things. And just used to be down right bitchy. I never understood why, I still don't. Maybe it was something I did, I mean why else would they do it? I must've done something which made them behave that way.

Anyway, enough self loathing. It's making it depressing.

There's another glass of water next to me. I assume Esme dropped it off while I was daydreaming. I take a sip, I can still taste the sick in my mouth. It makes me gag.

Fuck sake.

I was hoping for a peaceful day, but I guess I can't get anything I want. What do I care. I dont. I fucking don't care at all.

I sigh and throw the glass to the floor in anger. I give up with all this. I don't want to me this fucking person. I don't want to feel trapped and alone. I want my friends. I need a fucking hug.

Why am I so weak? I shouldn't feel like this. I haven't even been here this look and this place is already making me snap. The shattered glass on the floor looks sharp, I kick it of the way and storm over to the opposite wall. Slamming my hands on it hard and hearing a crunch. I need it to stop. Everything can stop. I fall to the floor, back wards and land on the glass. It digs into my skin and I'm sure I'm bleeding. I don't care. I can abrely feel the same urges running through my body. The very same strong urges that made me kill my parents. It's building up inside me.

Here we go again.

**I'm sorry it's taken a while for me to update, I truly am. Here's the next chapter for my readers. I hope you enjoy it. A review would be wonderful. Oh and thank you for those who left a review last chapter :) They made me smile :) I always love hearing what people think of my stories. Hopefully the next chapter will be up soon. **

**Also if you notice and spelling/grammar mistakes, please pooint them out and I will fix them, thank you. **

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